Officially Hitched 💍

Wedding Bands

Last week, we got officially hitched, and I am now Mrs…. Who am I kidding. I didn’t change my name because I hate paperwork and I have way too much of it already.

The marriage ceremony and the lunch with the two sets of parents (who met for the first time that morning) went as well as it could have! We were so relieved. We both have some anxiety regarding ways our parents are unpredictable, so we were both really afraid something might just explode… But we overall spent a nice 4 hours or so together, and then disbanded.

And we’re officially married! 💍

It’s so weird to refer to my partner as my husband. WEIRD! Doesn’t help that we were engaged for all of a few weeks before we decided to get married.

💰 Money Money

Because I’ve left my corporate job, and we’ll be living mainly on my husband’s income and putting my own into retirement, we decided to merge our assets together.

This turned out to be a process in itself, as we have both been operating as independent entities for half a decade to a decade, so we both have a lot of accounts.

When we finished consolidating our accounts into one Mint account, I counted 8 bank accounts, 11 credit cards, and 9 investment accounts including our retirement accounts. It’s kind of overwhelming to keep tabs on.

But I’ve updated my trusty Google Sheets spreadsheet to include his assets and I’ll be logging our combined net worth from here on out.

💴 Net Worth

So June’s Net Worth update will be the last one that will be just my own.

I ended my single life without reaching my $150,000 net worth goal, but honestly, I got pretty dang close, and I’m pretty proud of myself for that!

Especially since my $150,000 net worth goal was for end of 2019, and it’s only a few days into July!

🧠 Mindset Change

This whole mindset change of “my money” becoming “our money” has been a struggle and weird feeling for both of us. It’s kind of strange to suddenly be accountable for your spending with another person again after we left our parents and got our own jobs.

It’ll definitely be an adjustment, and we’re planning on taking it slow and leisurely. I don’t like to be micromanaged and neither does he, so we’re going to have to figure out a good system that keeps us accountable, but not feeling scrutinized.

Currently, I’m leaning towards an anti-budget of maxing out Mr. Z’s 401k and HSA (this one doubled because I’m on his insurance now), then saving $1,000 a month of take home, and then we just try to not dip below a certain amount in the checking account.

Mr. Z wants to try a budget, but I’m not sure how difficult it’ll be with both of us doing whatever we do. It sounds silly, but I never considered how difficult it is to control things that isn’t… Yourself.

I have my hobbies, things I value. Mr. Z has things he values and his own hobbies (that cost a lot of money, btw. LOL). And neither of us want to invalidate each other’s values. But at the same time, we have to be responsible and figure out when to put a gentle hand out and say, “Ok. Chill out. We can’t ‘afford’ that.”

I acknowledge I’ve gone a litttttleeee out of control the past month with quitting work, getting engaged, and getting married, so I need to reign in my materialism and desire to eat nice things! Good thing that there’s not much to eat in the ‘burbs I’m moving to next month! 😂

How Much is “Enough”?

When we were trying to figure out how much to pay for rent, where to live, and how much to budget, we ran into the issue of… How much is “enough”?

How much saving is “enough” savings? How much savings is “too much” savings? Where are we ok with sacrificing, and where are we not ok with sacrificing in terms of quality of life?

If we try to up our savings rate, there’s almost no limit to how frugal we could live. We could move in with 2 other couples to pay minimal rent in a house. Hell, we could move in with our parents to have free rent. But obviously, we want to start a family (even if it’s just a family of two) unit, so we want to live somewhere we enjoy being.

With 2 401Ks maxed out, and saving $1,000 a month, that’s already $50,000 a year we will be saving. And that’s on top of the a little over $500,000 net worth we’ve already accumulated collectively before we turned 30.

We’ll also be maxing out our Roth IRAs, which will come from the previous year’s savings, so we’ll have more tax-sheltered growth as well.

I was thinking about how, now that I’ll have an i401k, I could put more money after the initial $19,000 into the “employer” side… But then I won’t be getting any “salary” by the end. And though we can “afford” that… I’m not sure if it’s good for our quality of life.

We’re thinking about putting the “salary” I pay myself from my self-employment, at least for the first year or two, into our vacation fund.

Mainly, our honeymoon fund for probably next fall. It’ll give me something to work towards, and it’ll be an exciting way to spend my first year of hustling’s money. (Beyond the $19,000 that will go into the i401k.)

👨 Mr. Z

I’ve been telling Mr. Z that he should start writing guest posts for this blog, especially given that he has his own nuggets of personal finance wisdom he’s gleaned over the years, especially with his stint living and working in Silicon Valley where money is spent like it’s toilet paper and his days obsessed with day trading, but he says he needs to write those posts for HIS blog first.

So we’ll see what happens!


  1. Abigail

    Congrats on the nuptials! Glad they went smoothly!

    Sounds like you have a lot to figure out, but you’ll get there. And don’t forget that you need to pay yourself SOMETHING if you have an S-corp or the IRS will take a hard look at you. If you don’t pay yourself anything, you avoid FICA taxes, which is handy but could also get you audited.

    That’s assuming you’re an S-corp anyway. But since you talked about being an employer and paying yourself, I assume that’s your setup (or something very similar). I’d recommend checking with an accountant to make sure you’re paying yourself enough to avoid IRS scrutiny.

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